Well here it is, my first real blog. I'm a girl, of many words and little action. Lately I've been on a mini crusade to switch it around. I think I've made some progress, which is rare, any declaration I make about losing weight, redoing my wardrobe, becoming an actress and maybe even highlighting my own hair seems to drift up and be carried off by the wind as soon as the words leave my mouth. Little ever changes and when it does, I'm afraid its rarely for the best.
*Side Tidbit: deciding to write this in a school computer lab was a very large mistake. Why? Two reasons, the title of my blog is very misleading and very large, any "over-the-shoulder" peeper can right away register "Very Single", now I seem like just another match.com-er, seduced by the idea of having strangers find my future husband, saving me the trouble of 5 inch high heels, $30 dollar bar tabs and the droll experience of being picked up by men with only half their usual level of cognizance. The second reason is that a man-boy (a boy that looks like a full grown man, but not in the good way) is now staring and giving me that oh so creepy smile. Perhaps I should cross out "Very Single" and put "Very Gay". Hrm...actually I take that back, it may lead to some unsavory images (on my part) in his head.
Anyway, back to whatever it was I was trying to get at before. This time I made the declaration of starting my own blog, and of course this was met by mockery, so to prove her (my close friend, we'll name her Bowzer) wrong I made this blog.
As if you already haven't had enough, here's a little more about me:
I'm 5'3, a small Korean girl weighing in at about 130 (at the moment, due to change) lbs. I am currently on the Forever Diet, my self-esteem is sub par at best and I have unresolved daddy issues which leads to me into bad relationships with men and even worse hook up situations. Usually my temporary (very temporary, like one night or a month at best) scarlet affairs lead to spontaneous outburst during inappropriate times. No, I do not have Tourrettes, although some might argue otherwise. The memories of affairs tend to flash back and in a fit of disgust, I physically retaliate against the offensive image.
Despite growing up in a somewhat traditional korean household, complete with smell and snide comments, I possess, what I believe to be extremely American traits, such as my love, nay, obsession with men from Minnesota and my general contempt for other countries. I also have a secret passion for cowboys, country music and potpourri.
Bowzer, sometimes tells me that I'm a grandma trapped insi.de a 22 year old's body (but what she's really thinking is a raunchy old woman). I admit it, I'm a perv but what's a girl to be when she's sexually deprived but surrounded by young beautiful men who are gay all the time? No, I am not one of those girls who has multiple gay friends. I go to a school which is located next to the gayest part of the midwest.
Very single...where to begin? Long story short, I only go on first dates, even if I wished otherwise and my longest relationship was for 3 months, sophomore year of High School. I've only had sex 3 times, each time I would say is replaceable for an evening at home with some Dairy Queen and a Netflix movie, I would still receive the same amount of pleasure, maybe even more.
I'm not really expecting anyone to notice my little blog, let alone read the posts but it does feel nice to write.
Have you ever felt this way? Like you're not your own person? Trying to be some pseudo-Carrie Bradshaw from Sex in the City? I'm young, but I feel old and burnt out already. There are so many things I want to do, but life keeps telling me that I've made one too many mistakes already and I pretty much have to spend the rest of my life paying it back, literally. Loans and interest rates, scarier than STDs at times.
*Note: The more I write, the less likely Bowser will finish reading it. I hope she never finds this blog, although her internet surfing skills are uncanny. Whelp, if she does, the only consequence to be suffered is intense embarassment.
